Planned Parenthood Uses Snooki?

Jar Jar Binks

George Lucas once had a great idea that was perfect on its own: the original Star Wars trilogy.  Then, he decided to piss off his loyal fans by making prequels ("Deserve not the title Star Wars" as Yoda would say), but the atrocity did not end there.  Lucas felt he needed to insert a cute and cuddly character for laughs.

Jar Jar Binks sadly survives the Star Wars films

Meet Jar Jar Binks, a Gungan from the planet Naboo.  He also quite possibly suffers from, at minimum, mild mental retardation.  Jar Jar even spawned charges of racism!

Jar Jar Binks did not ruin the Star Wars prequels, as they were ruined without him, but he certainly made them worse.

Final Verdict: Should George Lucas want to redeem himself for the crime of Jar Jar Binks, he should recut the Star Wars prequels so that Jar Jar is removed after being killed by the jedi.  Only a Gungan genocide will make up for this crime against humanity.

Things Worse Than Being Single on Valentine's Day

Quick list of things that are worse than being single on Valentine's Day:

• Having to watch the film Valentine's Day
• Listening to Justin Bieber
• Getting ousted as leader of Egypt
• Being one of the victims in the Saint Valentine's Day Massacre
• Spending Valentine's Day with Ben Roethlisberger
• Eating at Bell Book & Candle
• Being shot by an actual bow and arrow
• Being stuck in a closet with a coked up Charlie Sheen just outside

Feeling Cupid's love

Olivia Wilde's Divorce

Olivia Wilde is divorcing her husband of eight years.  The news of this split was met with mixed reaction with men becoming overjoyed and women dismayed at the thought of losing their men to Ms. Wilde.

Olivia Wilde aka "Cleopatra"

It has been less than 100 hours since the news of her separation became public, but men are lining up to ask her out.  There are reports that men are camping out in front of her Hollywood home.  John Fitzsimmons, one of the men camping out to meet Wilde, said, "Many of us haven't camped out together like this since Star Wars Revenge of the Sith!  It's great to see old friends, but this time we're not in costume."

The 80s

The 80s were a decade where we were introduced to some rather interesting fashion, Tom Cruise, Charlie Sheen, Molly Ringwald, Michael J. parachute pants, Miami Vice, gigantic cellphones and many, many more people/things.

So were the 80s a good decade?  This question is now being debated vigorously in the halls of academic institutions, offices, bars and family dinner tables. The fashion and music are forgettable, but then there are the classic films that came from the 80s: The Breakfast Club, Weird Science, Ghostbusters, Wall Street, Indiana Jones (not counting Indiana Jones and The Temple of Doom because it was as bad as any of Vince Vaughn's recent work), Back to the Future, Ferris Bueller's Day Off and Sixteen Candles.

The shame that is 80s fashion

The Super Bowl

It's Super Bowl Sunday and the entire nation pauses to watch grown men try to turn their opponents into quadriplegics!  Then, we press our faces close to the television in between watching gigantic men inflicting severe head trauma on one another, and view the thing we all want to see: the commercials!

The commercials really are the highlight of the entire night, as the public will remember the catchier ones much longer than how Aaron Rodgers completed X passes for Y yards and Z touchdowns.  Tomorrow morning the water cooler will be filled with talk of "Did you see that Volkswagen ad [embedded above] with the boy dressed as Darth Vader?"

Late Night Relaxation at Ava Lounge

Dream New York, a boutique hotel, boasts one of the nicer penthouse lounges found in New York City.  With southern and western views that are quite aesthetically pleasing despite being able to see Times Square, Ava Lounge provides for a nice time with good friends.

The female bartenders know how to mix a drink and make you forget the higher than preferred price of it by utilizing their "charm".  A friend's order of a vodka tonic prompted one bartender to lean in closer offering more than a glimpse of cleavage, while my order of water caused the bartender to not only cease her expose, but to provide me with a partial smile that was indicative of her knowing I would not be leaving a tip for tap water.